What to Do If Your Parents Are Divorced

Hey, Awesome Teen!  Divorce is not a fun topic, especially if it hits close to home. So, today we're going to talk about what to do if your parents have divorced.

Most likely, your parents' divorce made you deeply sad, or angry, or resentful, or conflicted, or confused, or cynical of marriage--or all of the above. One thing it certainly didn't do is make you happy.  At least, not in the long run. You may have felt relieved that the arguing was over, but deep down, your heart was grieved.

Divorce is not what God intended for a marriage. And just because your parents got divorced doesn't mean you will get divorced. In fact, you can learn some very important lessons from your parents' divorce that will help you make your own marriage strong and lasting when the time comes for you to be married.

So, here are some things that will help you handle your parents' divorce:

1) Talk to God about all of your feelings. And I mean ALL of your feelings. Why? Well, first of all, because God already knows how you feel about your parents' divorce, and second, God loves it when you vent to Him. Yes, vent!

The Psalmist David in the Bible was one of the best venters I know. He poured out his heart to God. He told God when he was sad, when he was afraid, and when he was confused. He even let God know it when he was angry with Him.

This is one of the reasons God called David "a man after His own heart." You see, David was real with God. He was honest and transparent with Him. 

2) Forgive your parents for getting a divorce. Forgiving those who hurt us is, perhaps, the most important thing you can do in life. You see, bitterness will keep you a prisoner to your hurt, while forgiveness will free you from your hurt.
 
3)  Pray for your parents. If they do not know Jesus, pray that they will come to know Him. If they do know Him, pray that He will heal them of the hurt they, too, have suffered from the divorce.

4) Ask God to give you wisdom when the time comes to choose your own husband. God says that He will gladly and generously give us wisdom. All we have to do is ask Him for it (James 1: 5).

"Your past does not equal your future."                                    ~ Dr. MaryAnn Diorio

5) Pray for your future spouse. It is not too soon to start praying for the person God wants you to marry. Pray that he or she will love and follow Jesus. Pray that he or she will be a good spouse to you and a good parent to the children God will give you.

Remember: the past does not equal the future. Just because your parents got divorced does not mean you will get divorced. So, don't be afraid to get married. Just be sure that you marry the person God chooses for you.

What, in your opinion, should a married couple do to avoid divorce? Please post your answers in the comment box below. Thanks!

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"The past does not equal the future." ~ Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)
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How to Keep Your Cool When Someone Offends You

Jesus said that offenses would come (Luke 17: 1). So how do we handle them when they do come?

First of all, let's define what we mean by an offense. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, an offense is "the state of being insulted or morally outraged." Another online dictionary defines offense as "annoyance or resentment brought about by a perceived insult to or disregard for oneself or one's standards or principles."

Offense occurs, therefore, when someone says or does something that insults us or outrages us. When we are offended, our natural reaction is to strike back, to seek revenge, to punish the offender.

But God's way of dealing with offense is the exact opposite. He commands us to respond to offense with love.

Offense is a tool of Satan to get us off track in our walk with Christ. How you respond to offense is extremely important. Here are some ways to make sure that you do not fall into the trap of offense:

1- Give every offense to God. This includes giving him the hurt that the offense caused in your soul. 

2-Do not seek revenge for the offense. God says this in Romans 12: 19: "Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, 'I will take revenge; I will pay them back,' says the LORD." 

3-Forgive the person who offended you (Matthew 6: 14). Since God forgave us, we must forgive others. If we do not forgive those who offend us, God will not forgive us of our sins. This is a very sobering truth.

4-Pray for the person who offended you (Romans 12: 14). By doing so, you will be returning good for evil. 

The next time someone offends you, apply the four principles listed above. As you do, you will be freed from the hurt that the offense caused you. Instead, you will be filled with the joy and peace of Jesus Christ.

And there is nothing better than that! :)

NOW IT'S YOUR TURN: What do you do when someone offends you? Please leave a comment in the box below.

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"How to Keep Your Cool When Someone Offends You" by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)
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WHATEVER HAPPENED TO MODESTY?

Hey, Awesome Teen!

With Christmas behind us and freezing weather upon us, if you're like me, you're probably thinking of warmer weather. Already, I've been getting catalogues in the mail advertising swimsuits and party dresses and other warm weather clothing.

One thing I've been noticing more and more is the indecency of some of the clothing being sold today.  Clothing styles are revealing body parts that should not be revealed except in marriage. 

What's worse is that girls who claim to follow Jesus are wearing these clothes. In my opinion, this dishonors Christ.

Now, before you get your hackles up, let me assure you that I think we ought to look as beautiful as we can and dress as fashionably as we can. But fashionably doesn't mean indecently.

So, what am I talking about?

I'm talking about low-cut dresses that show not only cleavage but half the breasts as well. I'm talking about short skirts that allow others to see way up to your underwear. I'm talking about hip-hugging clothing that exposes your navel. In short, I'm talking about any clothing that reveals body parts that should be kept private. 

Lest you think me old-fashioned, let's take a look at what God says about modesty:

1 Corinthians 6: 19-20 - "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."

1 Timothy 2: 9 - "Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control."

I have one question for girls who dress indecently: Why are you doing so?  Most of the time, girls dress provocatively in order to "provoke" the attention of guys. And why do they want to provoke the attention of guys? That is the question that each girl must answer for herself.

Boys are physically aroused by what they see. A Christian girl who intentionally dresses in such a way as to arouse a guy is leading him into temptation and, possibly, into sin. This should not be.

The Bible says this in Romans 12: 2:  "Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world...." Are you copying the behavior and customer of this world in the way you dress? If so, repent and start obeying God. Don't allow yourself to be a tool of the devil in causing others to sin.

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How to Know What to Do with Your Life

Hey, Awesome Teen!

Have you figured out yet what you're going to be "when you grow up"?  I write those last words with the full knowledge that you are almost all grown up and have some very important choices to make.

Consider this: In the next five to fifteen years--depending on your current age--you will need to decide what profession to pursue, what college to attend (or not attend--depending on your career choice), and what person to marry if you decide to get married.

All of these big decisions involve a lot of smaller ones: like, should I go to a four-year college or should I start at a community college, aka two-year college? Or should I go to college at all? 

If I do go to college, how am I going to pay for it? And do I want to spend half my life paying off my college loans?  If I don't go to college, what should I do to earn a living? 

Regarding marriage, you will face these questions: Should I get married or should I stay single?  If I do get married, whom should I marry?  How will I recognize my spouse? If I stay single, what does God want me to do with the life He has given me?

With so many possible paths to take, what's a teen to do?

Here is a suggestion:  Ask the Holy Spirit what to do.  

After Jesus returned to Heaven, He sent His Holy Spirit to lead us and guide us into all truth. This means that as you seek the Holy Spirit, He will give you wisdom and direction to make the right choices for your life. 

Bottom line, there are only two things we need to do in life:

1) Hear the voice of the Holy Spirit; and
2) Obey His voice. 

If you learn how to do these two things, you will never make a wrong decision in your life.

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"To make right choices: 1) Hear the voice of the Holy Spirit and 2) Obey His voice." ~ Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)

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To Follow or Not to Follow the Crowd

Hey, Awesome Teen!

Have you ever heard of the expression "the blind leading the blind"? Do you know exactly what it means?

It describes a situation in which the person leading the way knows as much as or even less than the one he is leading.  In other words, the leader won't be able to take the follower any farther than the follower already can get by himself.

Obviously, this doesn't make for a good situation, does it? If we want to get somewhere but don't know how to get there, we need to follow someone who does know how to get there.

So, what does all of this have to do with crowds?

Well, a lot!

People like to follow crowds, especially at school. There's something about following a crowd that makes us feel secure and special. 

But what if we are following the wrong crowd? 

You see, crowds are usually going in the wrong direction. If everybody is doing something, then very likely what the crowd is doing is wrong. 

For example, today we see crowds of teens rebelling against one's parents or having sex or cheating on tests. All of these things are wrong, but the crowd will try to tell us these things are not wrong.

Years ago, I heard a quote that said this: "Observe the masses and do the opposite." In other words, watch what everyone else is doing and do the opposite. This is a wise formula for success.

It is also a wise formula for living as Jesus wants you to live.

Remember: the people you choose to imitate today will determine what kind of person you will be tomorrow. 

Do you want to be like the people you are imitating today? If not, do the opposite.

Now, it's your turn: Do you struggle with following the crowd? Do you need to belong in order to feel special and important?

Please share your comments in the box below. The words "No Comments" simply mean that no one has yet posted a comment. So, be the first one! :)

TWEETABLE: Are You Afraid of the Future? by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)
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Please send in any questions you'd like to see discussed on this blog. Please email your question to me at drmaryann@maryanndiorio.com.  Thanks! 

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What Is the Meaning of Your Life?

Hey, Awesome Teen!

One of the greatest questions you will ever ask yourself is What is the meaning of my life? How you answer this question will determine whether or not you fulfill your destiny.

Let's start with the basics:

1-Your life has meaning. To believe otherwise is to believe a lie. Unfortunately, our modern educational system teaches evolution, and evolution teaches that you came from an amoeba or a monkey and that you are here by chance.

This is one of the greatest lies ever perpetrated on the human race. The truth is that you were directly created by God for a specific and wonderful purpose (Read Psalm 139). This gives you great value and worth. It also gives great meaning to your life.

2-God has a special plan for your life. As you discover and fulfill that plan, you will experience great joy and fulfillment. You will also benefit the people in your circle of influence.

God created you with specific talents and gifts. This gifts are not only for your enjoyment, but, more importantly, they are to be shared with others for their benefit.

3-The only way you will discover the true meaning of your life is by accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord.  No other way will work.  Why? Because the meaning of your life has its roots in Christ and can only fully blossom in Christ.

If you have not yet accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord, I urge you to do so now. Here is a prayer you can pray:

Lord Jesus, I come to You just as I am. I believe that You are the Son of God, that You died for my sins, and that You rose again from the dead. I ask You to forgive me of all my sins. I accept You now as my Savior and my Lord. Make of me all that You created me to be. Show me the meaning of my life so that my life may bring You great glory! In Your Name I pray. Amen.

If you prayed this prayer, you are now a child of God. Please write to me to let me know. I will send you, free of charge, a little booklet on how to grow in Christ.


NOW IT'S YOUR TURN: Do you know the meaning of your life? If so, how did you discover it? What part did Christ play in your discovery?

TWEETABLE:
"The only way you will discover the true meaning of your life is by accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord." ~ Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)

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Are You a Slave to the Lie?

Hey, Awesome Teen!

Did you know that you are a slave to whatever you believe? That's right. Whatever you believe will guide your life and draw you in its direction.

This makes believing the truth pretty important, doesn't it? Why? Because if you believe a lie--or more than one--you will go more deeply into slavery.  But if you believe the truth, you will be set free.

In fact, Jesus Himself said this: "You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32).  So, the next question is, What is the truth? 

The Truth is a Person, and His Name is Jesus Christ.  When Thomas asked Jesus where He was going and how to get there, Jesus said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through Me" (John 14: 6). 

Jesus is also the Word of God, which means that when you study the Bible, you are actually studying Jesus and getting to know Him. He and His Word are one and the same.

As you study the Bible, you will discover truth.  The truth will reveal the lies you are believing.  Anything that does not agree with the Bible is a lie.

For example, let's say you believe that you are here by chance and have no purpose in life. Then you read Psalm 139 in the Bible that tells you you are awesomely made and are here for a purpose. At that moment, you recognize that you have been believing a lie. 

So, what you should do? You should renounce the lie, repent of it, and embrace the truth you just read in the Bible.

As you study God's Word, He will show you the lies you are believing. As you recognize each lie, renounce it, repent of it, and embrace the truth that revealed the lie to you.  The more you do this, the freer you will be.

Now, it's YOUR TURN: What lies have you been believing? Chances are good that others reading this have been believing the same lies. So, let's share with your fellow Gabriel Girls and encourage them to be set free, too!  You can post your comments in the box below. Thanks! We're eagerly waiting to hear from you. Your opinion matters!

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"You are a slave to whatever you believe." ~ Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)

"You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." ~ John 8: 32 (CLICK TO TWEET)

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How to Make Wise Decisions by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio

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Hey, Awesome Teen,

The teen years are full of decisions. Big ones, like should I go to college? If so, where? What should I study? If I don't go to college, what job should I take? What classes should I take in high school? Should I date this guy? Should I go to this party? And on and on and on.

One of the greatest blessings of following Jesus is that we have Holy Spirit to guide us in every decision we make. He knows the plans the Father has for our future, and Holy Spirit will lead us in the direction of those plans if we allow Him to do so.

After following the Lord for almost 51 years, I've learned this: There are really only two things we need to do to make wise choices:

1) Listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit;

2) Obey the voice of the Holy Spirit.

Listen and Obey. If we do these two things, we will never make a wrong decision in our life.

How do you listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit? First of all, you have to get to know His voice.  How did you get to know your mother's voice or your best friend's voice? By spending time with them.  We get to know a person by spending time with that person.

The same is true of Holy Spirit. We get to know His voice by spending time with Him.

Holy Spirit is the third Person of the Trinity. He is the one we tend to forget about because
we sometimes forget He is a Person. We may think of Him as a floating cloud or a breath of air or a dove or a tongue of fire. The truth is Holy Spirit is a Person, and a powerful one at that!

Get to know Holy Spirit! Get to know Him well. He is your friend, your counselor, your helper, your advocate, and your guide on the road of life. As you follow Him closely, you will make wise choices that will lead you into the great destiny for which God created you.

Now, it's your turn: Can you name a time when listening and obeying Holy Spirit's voice kept you from making a wrong decision? Please share your experience with our readers. You can post your comment in the box below. Thanks! :)

TWEETABLE: "How to Make Wise Decisions" by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)

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Why Sex before Marriage Will Hurt Your Future

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Hey, Awesome Teen!

What's on your mind? Yes, please let me know! This blog is for you, and I want to address the biggest issues going on in your life. So please leave a comment. If your issue is private, please feel free to email me at drmaryann@maryanndiorio.com.

While I am eagerly waiting for your reply, I'd like to address something that needs to be talked about but often isn't.  And that is the topic of sex before marriage.

Today, like never before, young people are facing the temptation to have sex before marriage. Our culture puts the pressure on by saying it's okay if you love the guy or the girl.

Well, I'm here to tell you this: It is NOT okay!!! 

You see, marriage was designed by God to reflect Christ's relationship with the Church. This relationship is pure and holy.  Satan wants to pervert and destroy the marriage relationship by deceiving us into thinking that what is wrong is really right. 

Regardless of what others may say, sex before marriage will harm you. Here are a few of the ways in which you will get hurt:

1-Having sex before marriage will hurt your future marriage.
How? The act of sex creates a soul tie with the person with whom you are having sex. If this soul tie is created outside of marriage, it will be an evil soul tie that will affect your future relationship with your husband if you do marry. An evil soul tie will place an emotional and spiritual wedge between you and your husband and cause problems in your marriage. Many divorces today are caused by ungodly soul ties formed in past sexual relationships. If you've had illicit sex with more than one guy, then you've formed an ungodly soul tie with each of those guys.

2-Having sex before marriage will rob your future husband of the gift of your virginity and rob you of the joy of giving your husband this gift.
While your husband may forgive you, he will always feel the grief of knowing that he was not the first and only person with whom you had sex. He may not tell you this, but it will remain in his heart and affect the closeness between you. 

3-Having sex before marriage will affect your future sexual relationship with your husband because you might compare your husband with your previous partner or partners. 
While you may not want to do this, you will, and that comparison could destroy your marriage.

4-Having sex before marriage could give you a sexually transmitted disease that will affect you the rest of your life.
And affect not only you, but your husband and your children. Some STDs are incurable but by the grace of God! 

This is serious stuff!

Sex outside of marriage is sex outside the covenant of marriage, a covenant that God established for your protection and peace. When a girl agrees to have sex outside of marriage, she is flagrantly disobeying God's command and putting herself in the way of great spiritual, emotional, psychological, and physical harm.

Perhaps some of you reading this have already had sex outside of marriage. If so, let me remind you that God is merciful and will forgive you if you repent of your sin (1 John 1: 9). So ask Him to forgive you and purpose not to have sex again until you are married.

 
Remember this: "There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death" (Proverbs 14: 12).  Don't follow that way! 

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